If the FBI are watching me, they should have burst through the door by now


Watch Dogs 2 (2016)

It was the new big fear of the 80s and 90s – hacking. What is it? How is it done? Probably not a single film or TV programme has gotten it right. I’m sure they nailed some of the details – half-Scottish half-Russian turbonerd Boris Grishenko from GoldenEye had the annoying, smug attitude down to a tee, up to and including having the effrontery to give back chat to a scarred and heavily deranged Sean Bean. He also typed like the wind as well; we were treated to several close ups of his furiously whizzing hands when we probably should have been seeing Bond throw a few remote mines and descend into near-madness trying to keep Natalya safe. For all of his self-serving chat, poor old Boris couldn’t do the business when it mattered and ultimately died a death befitting a weasel, when he was frozen in place amidst an exploding enemy base. Not so invincible after all.

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Budget is my least favourite word in the dictionary


Yooka-Laylee (2017)

You don’t need to know me particularly well to gather that I’m almost allergic to spending money. The way I see it, every little penny that I’ve tricked people into giving me is a hard-earned penny indeed. I’ll squeeze dosh from any man’s coffers – government, ignorant employers, family, the lot. I’ve even eyed up beggars’ cups on occasion – that’s how far I’ll go for a few quid.

Continue reading “Budget is my least favourite word in the dictionary”